Why me... again?

ASSALAMMUALAIKUM...

ALLAH..... He had test me again... and i am not sure whether its an answer or a test... but then i had been called by the UKM Academics. She/He told me that i can't take Pharmacy as my course and i was extremely  SAD.... allah knows how it felts... i had let go three of my offers just to stay here and i receive this kind of news.

I am sad... but i think that sad is just not helping...

Even regret is not the  best solution..

I just don't know whether Pharmacy is the best or not. I did istikharah but i don't know whether i had been answered or not..... but i'm writing letters to the director hopping and begging so my course will be consider back..

Last week was a really what we call a punching back. When i started to punch back all this sadness, i felt more sad.. therefore.. if faith said that i had to live with it.. than i will make this sadness bow to me and not i'm the one who bow towards it. If these sadness want to follow me.. than i will not be running but i will stay and stand high until they can't catch me.

I started not to cry like what i used to do. I'm a big girl now and i had to live to the coolest